first things first, i almost slashed my wrist with the excuse of wanting to 'live up to my name'. come to think of it, tht was firetrucking brainless, and i dont even rmb the reason what made me think of it.
my next reason is, 'wrister' was a personality i created for myself.
the name Wrister came up in abt november last year, which is one year ago. originally it was Wrister Bashad, but i shortened it to Wrister. if you were to go into my account, you should see the drop down menu of my past FB names in the account settings.
so what does Wrister Bashad means? 'Bashad', was created during the time tht i was damn angry with irshad cos he left me for the second time. 'Bashad' is short for 'bash shad'. there was tht time when i so badly wanted to beat the crap out of him =.=
the truth is, i used to be sorta like attention seeker. some examples would be my public behaviour, my fb statuses, the way i speak/type, the topics i talk abt with people. yes, i used to be a very open person. you can ask siying.
many weeks aft irshad like left me, started ignoring me and all tht, i told myself to withdraw myself from everyone. idk la, i really couldnt take it sia. i told myself to totally change my attitude. i told myself. i decided on it.
i totally changed the way i dressed. i used to be running around in tees and bermudas, but i started wearing hoodies and skinnies despite the hot weather. i started walking more often. i didnt go out with friends or family. even if i did, i hardly interacted.
i didnt smile a lot. i kept quiet abt everything. this was the first few weeks of my 'new personality down syndrome' =.= seriously i was gg damn crazy. i was upset. i really was. i felt so alone. so damn alone. haiz.
well anyway. lets not sidetrack from the main topic.
so now, my point is, 'Wrister', is just someone i created. she doesnt exist. i dont need her anymore bcos i have irshad now. and, uhm. MKI did open me up when i was with him. but not open enough for others to come in.
now, with irshad, imma open up this door again. i'll make my way to the crowd again. i dont need 'wrister' anymore. i had E'indah E'esa. and she'll be who i am, and i'll be who she is, forever and always.
-------------------------------------------------------
but then again, i've gotten used to the hoodie and skinnies get-up. and i like walking, i love it. and i dont mind certain keeping things to myself. and i wouldnt like everyone's eyes on me, i dont like attention alr. ok. nvm. but im still E'indah E'esa !
and these are just a few photos to show you how i was like last year. just bloody sombong giler babz, according to cousie. during all the camwhores i didnt bother acting cute or cheerful or all tht shit like how i used to uh -___-
k. you get what i mean. i feel damn embarrassed talking abt the moron i was. (then again, i still am a moron) kk. ya get what i mean!
all you lans are damn privileged to know the story behind Wrister. oh, yeah, one more thing. i took the name from the word writer, and it means 'to rise through'.
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