EW15

Disclaimer: please read this series of posts starting from EW29, then backwards.

Here we are. The mid-point.

It's hard going back to places we used to frequent every time you left. In 2014, Jurong East was scary, and I avoided it until one of the more 'mature' Heroine guys convinced me it was nothing, just by being a friend.

Even my school wasn't easy to walk around, with the ghosts of you coming to visit. And that was just a year's worth of memories; imagine three years later, when you left again in 2017, how much harder it suddenly got to navigate my own usual places. My own workplace was your usual haunt, the bench you used to sit while waiting for me to end.

Last year, again, I had a friend to meet on the other end, forcing me to overcome this wariness. If you thought it was strange to love an MRT line, imagine having some sort of fear for it.

The first fourteen stations turned out to be nothing, even with the abundance of memories from the previous four years. No tears emerged, and I thought it would be fine. And then this station came, and I realised I was only halfway through and the next station was Outram Park; I spoke too soon.

I wanted so badly to turn back. At the same time I wanted to reach the end more than anything, to quickly meet my friend and forget about you.

That was me being caught between crying and hoping for you to come back, and running into the future where you'll be completely forgotten and gotten over.

But somehow, like the previous stations, I got through Tanjong Pagar just fine, and the next and the next and the next, until I finally woke up to hear this train service ends here. I got to the end, temporarily forgetting that I'll still go back to the beginning anyway.