Queasiness.

you're tired. you're sick, and you're tired. you have trouble at every corner no matter which way you turn. you've been trying to put up with it, to smile through it all. but you're running out of strength.

pictures. those memories you want to forget. rings. the promises made which weren't kept. diary entries. the happiness of your past, which existence you want to burn, forever. they're all everywhere.

where do you go? wherever you look, there's something which reminds you. you don't want to remember anything. you want your memory to be erased, because your past does nothing but haunt you, hurt you, kill you slowly.

you want to run. you don't care where you run, as long as you don't stop. as long as your legs keep moving; as far as they can take you. as far as you can take yourself.

it's funny how you're so exhausted if you stay here, and yet when you start running, it feels like you can go on and on forever.

so go ahead, run. you know you can. but why won't you? why won't you, even when you so badly want to, even when you know you can? what's holding you down?

____

i had my Geography paper today. surprisingly, i thought it wasn't that bad. it was my first time completing the paper, with answers that to me were satisfactory. we'll wait til our results day to determine how i really fared.

it's Physics tomorrow, followed by Malay and the Science mcq next week. and yes i've said many times, that i'm gonna screw the world upside down afterwards!

followed me on instagram @_109TH yet? (;

so i haven't been feeling well lately. haven't had any appetite these past few days, and when i do eat, i feel stuffed halfway through. there's that churning feeling in my tummy that won't stop, and i kept wanting to puke.

i've not smoked in about a week already, so i don't think it's that. if it's my gastric flu that has returned,... i have no idea what to say.

but it's really uncomfortable. i hate it. there's something wrong with me. if there's already something wrong with me mentally, then this is physically.

anyway, thanks to all the people who sent me texts, and private messages, giving me your support. and for those who read my blog, too. if you don't know, i've always addressed my readers as Axes.

if you're wondering why, there's no special reason. i mean, it's based on the link 109blackaxes, which has its own story, but the reason i call you guys that is none.

okay, shall see you soon. i can't wait til my national exams are over!