I blog because...

"Thank you, God, for this gift that is my writing. Thank you, God, for this space where I have all the power. Sorry though, God, because I think I'm about to fuck you over.
Then I become God the only place I can. On the page." - This Gorgeous Game

I blog because it is the only way I make things happen.

I blog because empty pages are the only place I can become my own god.

I blog because it makes all the crazy things that have been happening to me seem like a story.

I blog because I like having people read the words I put together.

I blog because sometimes people would rather not ask me straight about how I've been doing, so I give them words on this space for them to know.

I blog because there are people who are feeling, or laughing at my misery, and either way, at least they can relate to my emotions.

I blog because when I've been wronged, I wish to tell my side of the story, even if they still think I am the bad guy at the end of it.

I blog because it makes me think that I have forgiven the people who have hurt me or were putting all the blame on me for their own hurt.

I blog because it is my way of sharing my thoughts and feelings with the wind, who has come and gone, now in the process of the latter, and I wish more than anything to talk to him.

I blog because he has kept his promise of reading my every post, and I am grateful for that.

I blog because I have made many friends through it, even though our conversations are technically just them listening to all my words from the other side of this screen.

I blog because it makes me feel like there is a constant audience reading, a train of support following me wherever I go, knowing all that is happening to me.

I blog because sometimes when you don't feel like talking, but you want people to know how you feel, you can just fill your thoughts into these empty pages that are easily accessible.

I blog because I get all kinds of reactions from people: admiration, pity, judgement, dislike, and it makes me feel alive, like I'm somebody.

I blog because writing all of this down makes it seem like the pain is over, even when it's not.

I blog because someday I will read these posts back and reminisce these memories, laugh at my past embarrassing moments, admire how my past self survived all that.

 The list goes on.

Whenever I open a new post, it's always for me. I want to record down a dream I had, or stupid metaphors that mean a lot to me, or a memory of time spent with someone I like.

Once it's posted, it's for everyone. I want people to get all kinds of emotions through the words I just typed out for myself. Get freaked out by my weird dreams, confused about my metaphors trying to understand them, go awww about my gushing towards a boy.

I blog for myself and for the people around me, including myself in the future.

And that's why I've been leaning towards blogging more than writing in my personal diary. I love my page, Solitary Author; she's a wall I can paint on with anything I like, a tree I can build a treehouse on and see the world, a stage where I am the only one everyone is looking at, a photo album where I can see how I've grown, a daughter I will take care of forever the moment she is born.

She's like a ghost I've been talking to from the moment I started writing in a diary when I was 7. A ghost whose soul has followed me from notebook to notebook and now resides in my blog. Kinda cool to think of it that way, heh.