sup my lans . syafie gave us sec 4 girls a lecture this morning. now for every one time we get caught for hair etc, we'll be given detention straightway. thanks a lot eindah.

k i stayed for art til 620 today ! but still felt like shit halfway , as always. had a very motivational song playing on repeat though. hehe.

went home with khai and naim , sent khai to his house , chit chatted at his place before he finally had his chance of showing me his way of kissing. reached home at like 8.

nowadays i only have him and siying . and a little bit of amirah occasionally.

he left me wanting more

sup my lans ! today was awesome cos i bonded with both my darlings Venusys Si Ying and Khairul Irfan :D !

asleah was still giving me some attitude . i didnt counter attack though, i did try to talk to her like normal. blah3 , aft sch went home and changed before gg out again to meet siying ! got cup walker , then went to asli village!

while waiting for our satay we saw cameras and suhaila salam (siying didnt know her name lah of course), like 2 tables away . like i was in camerashot , i kept on act shy shy but i was actually damn jakonist .

walked to ws next , got the iced egg . i got chocolate this time , while siying got apple lime. i was disappointed cos siying's didnt burst like my first one did , cos she didnt get to experience. almost cried sia.

went basement to buy pancake pulak . at least siying satisfied 2 of her cravings ! k then we walked to sch , went to our old slack spots of 2009 . so many of the cats grown up alr !

oh aye, at one point there was a bee smack dab in her face , and she started screaming and then a nearby cat got so stunned and ran away , omg tht whole scene damn bloody amusing sia!!

i didnt see blink today , but saw 3 and 4 , both of whom i still cant tell apart and whom i still havent given official names too . k , walked to sch's 17 bus stop , stopping by spc for aircon. took 17 for one stop with siying , went east cc awhile .

blah3 , went sch bus stop , walked back, and met khairul pulak. on the bus , he held my hand as he slept on my shoulder , aw... then at his house , hugged and sempat 2 (very brief!) rounds of french kiss . hehe. to say the truth he kinda caught me by surprise.

k then went to compass point with my mom , saw aidil and aimi ! dah lamer tak jumper, miss them siol . boohoo.

k dah tht's all.
i kinda despo to RD now! with my bestie Siying :D
think she's my only bestie right now. /: idk what's wrong with the rest.

guess what , i'm stressing out over the 4/2 surprise .
and abt the grad night vid too .

when will i be done ?!

he always end the sch week .

i love fridays !

alrighty , let me just Go thru today . went sch with khai , slacked at canteen before slacking at mt place , and then walked one round second floor before he sent me to 4/2 , which he insisted on. then blah3 , during cme was kinda slack .

did project with siying and shushan , before gg around class to record random moments . and then blah3 , it was maths which was boring as always . aft tht was lunch , went canteen on my own cos asleah walked on ahead again .

halfway thru lunch went off with siying to slack off at old places , and chit chatting abt random stuff. she told me tht asleah said to her , "i dunno why eindah not talking to me." banyak! i was so angry when i heard tht sia , serious.

played with the girls during pe including asleah , and i did try to joke with her again but to no avail, still .

went w/s with siying , alot of funny stuff tht i did laugh abt ! and then went back to art, did some before gg to play piano at canteen cos siying despo haha . but i played a little too , the few songs tht i knew.

yah timothy liar !

k, what next ? siying went off at 6 , and i was like sitting peacefully, listening to my songs when afnan they all came and kept hentak hentak the table tht i was sitting at, like wtf... and then syafie came along and was like , telling all of us to leave .

i stared at him , like glare ah, then he was like, "what , are u deaf ?!" -.- blah3 , went to bus stop and then khai came, walked to central , i sempat buy prepaid card while waiting for 358 . oh and when khai was running tht time so cute !

blah3, sent him home as always . dan danial dan was on the bus in front of us , i think i kinda narrowed the distance between us alr, i hope. hmm, then at the lift there khai and i hugged , like finally, hahah . i loved it.

yeah k dah.

asleah was like showing me some shit attitude today . i do know why i think , tht's why this morning i just Talked to her like normal hoping i could like lighten up the situation or what . she sits next to me in parade sq every morn .

so as always i told her all my random comments ah . then she kept on like, saying "oh." and nodding her head and avoiding eye contact with me. which is obviously like smth wrong ah . i know her ok -.-

tu takpe ah , i still talked to her like normal but getting ignored totally , yet i wasnt tht pissed . but then ah, during maths . you see ah, among our clique, the 8 of us are like split into 3 different classes . asleah and i happen to be in the same one. so since she didnt talk to me , i just Slept thru out the relief period ah.

so the thing is , nobody woke me up when the bell rang . including asleah. so i missed my lunch period, only waking up when it was like mother tongue alr. it pissed me off ah ! like i kept asking myself wtf was wrong with her sey .

so i stomped off to my MT class , angry and a little bit wanted to cry too . saw khai at the end of the classrooms corridor , tried to smile but i didnt have the strength . my lips were trembling .

when i was sitting at my place in the 3rd level spare room , i suddenly got real pissed at the neatness of tht classroom. stood up and started banging the tables, and kicking and throwing them across the room .

and then i just Sat back down and started shivering . i heard someone call my name , turned out to be khai and he asked if i was ok , so i just Nodded and looked back away .

then when he was gone i went back out to go to the toilet cos ppl were saying tht my lips were bleeding . came out to bump into faris and irshad . faris said hi to me and i naturally just Ignored without bothering to even glance at him .

then faris was like , "eh dont emo ah." i heard irshad gg all, "asal ngan dier sia?" like what does he care? then the tone also, like as if my anger irritated him like tht . what a douche!

k im done for today . tmrw then i share the few funny stuff tht i witnessed today .
and a little reminder , people have good intentions behind their actions .

gosh, today was another one of my not-so-fave days .

awesome moment !

hi , today was very very tight! had so many things booking me and bogging me down today, aft sch . there was MT remedial , MTL fortnight karaoke thingy , meeting , slack with khai , maths tuition. but it was all worth it !

mm hmm ... guess what ? today was amazing ^^ i love khai so much. u did awesome lah babe. haha. i loved it , and i love you!

today was awesome , spent the day with my khai . hehe. and he kissed me on my lips today ! i love his lips haha . then he said mine like marshmallow -.-
k, i love him .

short update only !

khairul irfan ♥

alrighty , went to kfc with siying and shushan earlier. alot of shit we laughed abt! esp. siying, the girl laughs a hell lot ♥ "ambek kau!"

blah blah blah , went to meet up with khai. he so cute !



went carpark rooftftop, and guess what.
it had exactly the same shelter as like the one on 500A sia !!!!! i got so happy, immediately climbed the little shelter. almost cried !!

k and then khai and i camwhore .





he and i are inseparable for now!

truly amazing videography and editting .
such intricate detail .

last night !

yesterday was peanuts . went to dte with my mom, nazriq, and my grandma . to eat ! i got curry rice, which was like smth i've always wanted to eat. straightway announced on facebook sey, hehe. (which is smth quite rare)

ok , so we ate, and it was my first time using facebook with khai's phone . blah3, nazriq and i sat at the pond thingy near the popeye's , just When this huge fish swam near us , and we were like, "eh woah!" damn bloody big sia the fish !

i saw it swim around like fwoosh! not only was it the biggest , it was the fastest sia! what else, jakonist mode ah.

made our way to mccafe , and got jakonist over the cakes . and then my mom ordered some hot chocolate where the guy draws smth on the fluffy stuff . damn awesome sey! yeah lah, jakonist lah. as for cake , nazriq and i got the oreo cheese cake one .

heh, both were faboulous! ytd was tiring as well though , kept getting frustrated and stressed over the slightest things . mm hmm ... k im hungry right now.

i'm a zombie right now.
guess what? when i closed my eyes and dozed off for awhile, i heard a little girl's voice in my head saying, "i'm sorry papa." and then i saw this girl sitting on a chair in a little victorian dress, head full of blonde curls .

just Like a doll .

For Khai ♥

song used: Lost In You - Three Days Grace
just A kind of teaser. a vid for khai coming soon ! more towards the coming, but not the soon. it's coming. but not soon. k u get it.

quick update !

hey lans ! hahaha. alrighty. currently editting footages tht i've collected the past week , so im just Gonna do this one quick update . first things first, prep exams are over! hehehehe. but prelims are starting on the first of august , and then there's MT n level oral.

ive finally gotten the chance to video edit ! gosh.

some funny stuff from this week !

asleah and i were walking past a table and were like talking when a girl from tht table yelled real loudly "ow !!!" asleah looked at the direction with a shocked face and was like, "terpranjat sey , aku ingat kau pijak kaki dier !"

i started laughing like shit and then we parted to do our stuff awhile . halfway thru i started snorting cos i tried to hold in my laugh . when we reunited, we told each other abt how we tersenyom sorang ! hahaha. hooboy, funny shit sia.

and then there was the farhan banging his canvas today during art... kelakar giler babz sia!

spent time with khai alot these few weeks. hehe. ive been trying to open up to his friends more, i wanna be the friendly one. k tht's too much, i just Wanna be friendly full stop. hehe.

khai is so cute in here ! hahahaha, i love him ♥

Being Khairul Irfan 's

aw, my evening was awesome ♥

alrightyy , slacked with khai at cc before gg for my maths tuition . both went extremely well. i love my khai so much ! but im sure he has his own problems despite tht flawless smile of his . problems tht he hides .

oh yeah , and as promised im supposed to talk abt the experience of being his gf . alrighty , here we go .

first things first , ppl are looking at us weird just Cos im older than him . isit such a WTF thing ? pfft , i dont get it. is love measured by age? really? i prefer younger guys anyways.

another thing is basically our personalities . to ppl who dk me , i am deemed as "emo" , cos my hair covers half my face and im always like looking down . and then khai is the happy-go-lucky one whom everyones knows and likes.

so he's always saying hi to ppl and vice versa when we're like at the sch bus stop waiting for the bus , or on the bus , or just Slacking around random places . it's like wherever we go, he's bound to know somebody. somebodies .

maybe it's our cca lah , cos i quit fencing in like 2009 and he's been faithful in his npcc , so he knows lots of ppl . whatever it is , im quite envious . envious tht he knows and is liked by so many ppl . compared to me .

he's like always talking to his friends while i stand aside and stare or do my own stuff . and when i'm in the mood to say hi to his friends or wave or what , they never look at me. it's like im almost invisible. so i dont bother anymore , which makes me quickly labelled as sombong .

and most of his good friends doesnt seem to like me very much . eg dan danial dan . he always looks at me and we lock eyes , but he never smiles or waves or whatever . idk ah. gosh .

yes , this is how i feel . but idk what to do. what do i do?
right. eat.

there's three papers tmrw !
maths paper 2 , geography, art. three painstaking subjects . but it's alright , cos i am hardworking.

had physics and english paper 2 today . both were smooth , but i aint entirely confident. k, this is just One very quick update. gg to meet with khai before gg for maths at 530 . see, im seriously trying very very hard. i wanna go to O levels .

alrightyy , once i get back , imma be talking abt my experience being khai's gf .

My good deed !

went out in the evening earlier, and i was like late in meeting my khai . and i still had to go get food before gg to sch's bus stop. at my house bus stop , while waiting for the 358 , i took a seat next to a blind man .

he must have sensed my presence cos he turned and look at my face . and then he said, "excuse me , would u let me know if bus 359 comes?" i was like , "oh sure !" and then i stayed there til the 359 came so tht i was able to play out the promise .

i didnt realize the good i did until i was like on my own 358. cos while waiting for the 359 , two 358s passed but i didnt seem to bother ,cos i was so intent on making sure tht the blind man got the right bus .

hehe , i feel so proud of myself sia.

Orange and Water .

oh, last night's dream .

i remember many classroom scenes . there was one in MT , but jaslyn was there for some reason. cikgu fatimah was like asking us to fill in the blanks , then we were all guessing and laughing at stupid answers .

farhan was in front of the classroom staring up at the screen when syafiq came over to my area (where jaslyn was at) and yelled at her , "eh why nail polish !? i was trying to record and u shifted my camera to ur nail polish !?" and then he took his cammie and walked away mumbling "douchebag."

and then there was another part where i heard farhan shouting , "chey, eindah stead dengan (stalker's name) sey !" and for tht moment , my dream self forgot who i stead with sia. i could hear my dream self wondering to herself. in the end then she was like , "oh i know alr! khairul irfan!" omg seram giler babz per.

k , and then another part was , i was staring at my hands . they were full of blood , and i rmb repeating to myself (my dream self lah) , "i dont wanna know whose blood is this , i dont wanna know whose blood is this" .

but the scariest has got to be this :

it was a sort of class excursion i think . i'm still hazy abt this part but we went into a tunnel of some sort when the whole place got flooded and most of my classmates were no longer in the dream. only me , siying , manfred , timothy .

we climbed out of tht tunnel and out onto the rocks . everything was just Water. water, and orange. the flats had all turned into cliffs , and they were as orange as can be . it was beautiful , truly beautiful. there were a few holes etched onto the cliff tht was like on the diagonal right of us , and the holes resembled a clock .

everything was in different shades of orange . truly spectacular. idk how to describe it other than orange and water .

the 4 of us laid there watching the orange , and talking . i rmb where the dream at this point was located. it's at the lane from the 358/17 bus stop towards the 3 bus stop near my sch. so yeah .

we were all like talking abt our classmates and saying how we miss them . i rmb how cozy we were , like knowing we only had each other left. sad aint it.

suddenly there was a strong gust of wind and the water went crazy with waves and it was like a storm lah. the 4 of us immediately stood up . manfred and timothy proceeded to gg back into the tunnel , and they were yelling "shit ! shit ! we're gonna die!" , but siying yelled at them , "no, shut up! i know tht we'll make it out!"

and then i woke up .
what's scary was tht , the first thing i noticed when i woke up was tht , my room was very very windy . my curtains were like totally open cos of the wind , if u know what i mean. what else? straightway ran to my parents' room sia .

scary shit sia . this was what greeted the corner near my window .

Prep Malay and Maths P1

sup lans! (k tht's what imma call my readers from now on)

had malay P1 and maths P1 today. it's just My prep exams btw . aint prelims or the real thing yet .

a conversation i had with my dad last night :
me: i'm having exams tmrw.
dad: what exam !? n level ah !?
me: no lah , havent yet. this is just Prep.
dad: prep?
me: yeah, prep.
dad: why does it sound likea type of dance like tht , prep, prep, prep.
-.-

and earlier on met with khai awhile during recess cos needed him to teach me a little bit of sec 2 maths . told asleah i wouldnt be with them much during recess , then she was like, "uh yeah lah , dah in a relationship mah , jadi kawan tu letakkan ke tepi siket ... " ):

alrightyy , khai taught me factorisation thingy cos i really suck at it /dont understand it despite all the years .

surprisingly maths was really easy btw ! went thru it with a breeze . the setter was ms huang huiling , think she definitely had a motive for setting the paper so easy . wanna bet? she's gonna lecture us on the next lesson tht she sees us .

aft sch slacked at fnn room with asleah , nicholas and rayner . blah3 , went canteen and got ice cream. had to get green tea cos i didnt want vanilla. and to be honest , green tea aint to my liking either . i like its smell though , smells like leaves . which are not very pleasant to be eaten .

i ate alot today ! cos i brought money. hehe. and turned out tht there aint any extra lessons today so i didnt get to go home with my khai . meeting him later , though he doesnt seem very happy abt tht for some reason.

tmrw's physics and , uh, english p2. if i aint wrong .
let's dance prep to dubstep !



oh and khai's ex was like walking right in fronta me earlier. she was smiling :D didnt get to smile at her though /:

sup peeps! went nex with my mom and nazriq today to watch Transformers 3 . got jakonist with the theater , they've got a lounge! got popcorn (salted pls) and root beer for myself , which finished like halfway thru the movie .

omg , transformers is like damn bloody awesome shit lah. optimus prime is like so hot , and bumblebee is adorable, hehe! and... i prefer megan fox , i dont like the new chick .




k , i've got lots of stuff to say , but i wouldnt wanna drag this short update .
tmrw's my EL P1 and SS ! i can do it for sure , i shall get promoted with the rest of 4/2!

maya was in last night's dream . hm, idk the position of all the stuff tht happened though , so this might be a little messy .

if i aint wrong i was the one who went maya's house. and then her mommy (who is also my aunt) told her to send me back home, so she did. i dont rmb seeing her smile , or hearing her laugh. in fact i think we just Walked on in silence .

when i was alr at my house , i thanked her and off she went . but then i realized tht her phone was with me or smth , so i chased her ah. she had alr walked out of the gate tht kept my house and many other houses in , and as she was locking it i yelled at her to wait for me .

she looked at me and we had eye contact , but as i ran towards tht gate she had alr begun to walk again . her speed was slow , she was in a stroll. but unlocking the gate was very tedious , i was struggling with it , and again when i was trying to lock it .

i left the gate unlocked as i ran towards her , and i finally caught up with her when she was standing in front of a food stall . her face was emotionless as she looked at me when taking her phone .

this whole scene scares me alr. it scares me alot .

there was another part abt me walking to sch with the usual girls . i think yeah, it was pearl, priscilla and shushan. and then i was like staring at this void deck and remembering smth. i do rmb what i remembered in the dream , but it's not really tht important .

and anyways the thing tht i remembered didnt occur there .

when i woke up , i was thinking abt what i remembered and i almost forgot everything abt it! which would be a miracle , but then i was like , oh shit, i do rmb everything alr.

yeah, tht part only i will understand.

yesterday was hell but today i'll be fine.